For Christmas, my boyfriend Charming got me another amazing and thoughtful gift . . . he named a star after me! So I could, for the first time ever, be supporting life right now, rather than just wiping it off my chest. Realistically, my star could be long dead by now, but to our eyes it’s still a bright and shiny star in the Scorpio constellation so that’s how I choose to think of it. Hopefully my star isn’t supporting the intelligent life that is one day going to come to Earth to pillage us for all our natural resources. If so, blame Charming not me.
I’ve already told you about the awesome gift he’d already given me and now this. Not that I have any plans of breaking up with Charming, but I couldn’t now if I wanted to; he’s made sure of that. Plenty of my family and friends have told me that they would disown me before they would him. Between all the wondrous and mindful gifts and his amiable personality, he’s secured himself into a place where he can do no wrong. I can’t help but fear that this has been his plan for the last year. Nobody is that good. He could turn on me at any moment and get abusive or get into weird shit like fisting, black tar heroin, or stamp collecting. Who would believe me at this point? He’s the golden child. He’s just out there, and he’s watching and waiting. What are you waiting for, huh? WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!